Anatomy of a “Christian” Facebook Post

Social media captures a screenshot of all that’s wrong with today’s brand of “Christianity,” the brand that’s preoccupied with ‘sin’ and the LGBTQ Community.

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Photo by Jack B on Unsplash

hen I first realized I had a child who was gender nonconforming, and might even be trans, one of the first resources I found most helpful was Lori Duron’s blog, Raising My Rainbow. Reading her blog, seeing her experiences virtually mirroring mine helped me feel a lot less alone on this journey. Her child CJ and mine were close in age, and seemed like they could be soul mates. CJ identifies as gender creative, meaning he doesn’t conform to traditional or stereotypical gender norms for his sex assigned at birth.

Over the years their family became more active in the LGBTQ community. This June, CJ had the distinct honor of being the youngest Grand Marshal in Pride’s 48-year history, when he was named 2018 Grand Marshal of O.C. Santa Ana, CA Pride. Later that month, Primary.com, a baby and kids clothing company that offers “better basics without logos, slogans & sequins” made a heartfelt post on Facebook, saying they were proud to call CJ and his family their friends. Underneath that, there was a sweet picture of CJ all dressed up for Pride, rocking the Grand Marshal sash, and wearing a rainbow array of items including tiara, shirt, tutu, and socks, and a pair of awesome diamond net fingerless gloves.

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Lo and behold, the first comment underneath this post slapped the smile off my face. It was from a self-professed Christian. Because, of course it was. (Names concealed, though I don’t know why I felt the need; it’s a public forum, but whatevs):

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Next, there followed a whole wide range of comments, mostly, not in “Christian” Woman’s favor. Which was a relief for once. There were amusing and witty one-liners:

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There were hilarious memes:

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There were astute observations and pledges of new customers:

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Wow. This was kind of a nice change from the bigoted persecution complex-laden “Christians” who seem to hijack a lot of the threads I see. There were even cautions regarding ramifications of religious bigotry:

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And then…

Then. There it was. The almighty, lone, “Good Samaritan,” just trying her damn best to help a fellow sister out. I mean, maybe she’s secretly BFFs with “Christian” Woman and this was just for show. But I kind of believe she’s the random casual observer that she portrays here, one who felt united in the shared persecution complex that so many of today’s brand of Christians seem to be plagued with. (It’s a two-parter):

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And this is exactly what’s wrong with “Christianity” today.

Just to recap:

1.) A harmless Facebook post was made by a company (Primary.com), praising & applauding a family (CJ’s) who shares in the same values as their company.

A company that’s passionate about kids. Giving praise to a gender creative child. Who is very much a part of the LGBTQ community. Who is teased and bullied at school just for being his authentic self and refusing to live in the closet — whether or not that has anything to do now, or later, with his sexual orientation is no one’s business; not to mention, gender identity and gender expression have nothing to do with sexual orientation in the first place (but that’s a story for another day).

Oh, and, just a reminder here that the company posted this whole thing to social media during Pride month. In a statement written by the company, written on its own company page.

2.) “Christian” Woman drops in and feels the need to leave her 2 cents. Which is her prerogative, and constitutional right, for sure. But. This is a public forum. Where she is out in the open, and thus, exposed to all the people who are morally and socially responsible, and who are willing to call her out for this nonsense — nonsense wrapped in bigotry, parading falsely as “Christianity.”

After all, “Christian” Woman came to the company’s page first, and she came to post what amounts to basically, a preschool child (or, you know, Sean Spicer during his White House days… take your pick) in the playground sandbox who, after not getting her way, stands up and yells, “That’s it! If I can’t have my way, I’m going home! And I’m taking all my toys with me!”

In the span of roughly a paragraph, she also manages to undermine Christianity, attempts to intimidate a large company by saying “you’ll no longer get my business” (they don’t need it), disparages some very good parenting (a.k.a. having unconditional love for one’s child — meaning, exactly as he is, not how his parents thought he would or expected he should be) as being “sad,” uses ignorant, homophobic speech by defining a whole community of people as a “lifestyle,” proclaims that loving & supporting such kid is “pushing” said “lifestyle” on them (that whole “gay agenda” thing, y’know?), attempts to gaslight everyone reading by stating, “nowhere in my post did I say anything about hate” (but she implied it. If it walks like a duck and acts like a duck…guess what?), and then claims it’s not “hate” that she’s displaying, but rather “disagreement” (to be clear, she disagrees with how someone was born).

3.) Another “Christian” Woman jumps in to say a lot more of the same, but also ramps it up a notch:

“Unlike the rest of these comments” (i.e., I walk on higher moral ground than everyone else here, because I’m going to…) “thank you, “Christian” Woman, for making a stand for what you believe in and for truth.” (Logical fallacy. If it’s her opinion, as she clearly stated it was — see above — then it can’t be “truth.” Opinions are not facts, and facts are not opinions.)

She continues, “Doing so is not hateful” (it is) “to anyone” (except, oh… you know… the entire LGBTQ and TGNC communities — but who’s counting, right?!)

Then she asserts “Not accepting what is wrong is not hateful” (actually, it is. Because it’s not for the Christian — or anyone else — to determine that the way another person is born is inherently wrong, and furthermore, insinuating as much is indeed hateful).

Then comes that overused Christian cliche: “Love the sinner without loving the sin.” (Now, I’m just gonna go out on a limb here and bet she doesn’t apply that same principle to, say, child abusers, rapists and murderers).

She then says “I pray this sweet boy finds Christ one day!” (Um… 1. how does she know that he hasn’t already, and 2. furthermore, if he has, how does she not see that he is already a better living example of a Christian than she is? and 3. What if he’s Jewish? Or Buddhist? Or Athiest?)

She continues, “I share your opinion and will not be supporting the company either” (Aha — busted! She just stated it’s an “opinion,” so there’s no way it can also be “truth.” Also? I kinda doubt she was supporting the company anyway. Just sounds like more empty intimidation: “Well, no, I haven’t actually bought anything from them… but… but… I totally would have, if they weren’t pushing the GAY AGENDA!”)

Her next statement strikes me as perhaps false. I mean, it certainly doesnt sound like this is her first rodeo: “I usually stay out of these sorts of things on Facebook” (but by golly, a large company supporting a kid who regularly endures harassment & bullying just for being himself has pushed me over the edge, gosh darn it!) “but you had so many people getting on you for being “hateful” yet they were being hateful to you” (again, “Christian” Woman came to the company’s page and dropped the first bomb. She’s not an innocent bystander here.)

Lastly, she finishes with “Thought you could use a friend and some positivity ;) God is Good! And to anyone else who reads this and disagrees, save your breath. I won’t be responding to your comments. I’m simply standing with a sister in Christ. God bless.”

My response back to her was this:

Dear Another “Christian” Woman, I know you said you’re not responding, so just food for thought; no response necessary:

I am a lifelong Christian. I was raised Presbyterian, briefly, and then southern Baptist, so I know the Bible well. Have also studied Biblical history, examining it from the historical context in which it was written. I’ve had near death experiences which have only made my faith stronger.

I don’t do organized religion anymore. I moved beyond that when I realized there are no denominations in Heaven. And sadly, most self-professed denominational Christians have gotten the Bible wrong, and more importantly, they’ve gotten the message of Jesus Christ wrong.

I know all the counter-arguments, how Baptists preach that we are supposed to hold our brothers and sisters “accountable,” that we are supposed to “approach them in love” to “call out sin,” that the Bible is the “infallible word of God” meant to be taken literally, etc., etc., etc.

The very thing that most Christians today fail to realize is that, if they are to abide by the infallible word of God, as God’s inspired message passed through and written down by men, as it’s presented in the Bible (which is really more like an anthology of books, by many authors — many of those books make up the Apocrypha which Christians don’t even usually get to read — and many books which were written by women but thrown out by the male patriarchy of the early church), then they must use that same blind obedience and apply it to the whole Bible.

To that end, have you given up all of your worldly possessions to follow Christ? Have you followed the Old Testament, which laid out all the rules (such as, you are not to plant different crops next to one another, nor eat shellfish, and we should stone women to death for various offenses)? Have you followed all of those rules, which Jesus Himself said He was not coming to abolish, but to fulfill?

I know the answer to that. The standard answer. That Jesus did fulfill all of that when He paid the ultimate price by giving His life for all our sins.

But He also said the greatest commandment was love. That love was THE most important, above everything else. More important than judging others, more important than prayer, more important than clanging like cymbals, proclaiming empty, overused phrases like “God is Good!” and “I’m praying for you.”

“Hate the sin love the sinner” does not even mean what you think it does. For that matter neither does the story of Sodom and Gomorrah, and all of the other verses and parables that Christians have cherry picked to fit their narrative that LGBTQ+ people are committing a sin (just for being born wired the way they are).

Here’s another example: Christians who use the Bible verse “spare the rod and spoil the child” to justify spanking their kids. They are completely blind to the fact that when these Biblical stories were written, the rod was used by shepherds as a tool to gently lead and guide their sheep, not to beat them with it.

Did you know that less than 1% of the entire Bible says anything at all about homosexuality, which actually wasn’t even a word or a concept when those books were written? So obviously, it wasn’t too high on God’s priority list.

The Bible says absolutely nothing against gay adults in a loving, consensual relationship. But, it does speak to the crime of gang rape. Likewise, nowhere in the Bible does it say that being born transgender, gender creative, gender nonconforming, or intersex, for example, are sins. There are references in the Bible to people who were “made eunuchs” and “born eunuchs,” which may be the Bible’s most solid evidence in affirming that LGBTQ+ people are born that way.

Appreciate that you want to help a sister out, but if you really wanna go there, you should know that your willful ignorance is a sin. Your judgment of what is “wrong” vs. right is a sin. “Making a stand for what you believe in and truth,” when it goes against God being the ultimate authority in discernment, is a sin. Assuming that this sweet boy hasn’t found Christ is a judgment, and therefore, a sin.

I will pray for you, “Christian” Woman, and for you, Another “Christian” Woman, that God will open your eyes and your ears and your hearts, to receive the message and understand that there is a place where scientific evidence, historical facts, and faith can all commingle. That using religion to justify bigotry is intolerable. Especially intolerable is using that religion to pretend that you love someone when you still hate integral parts of them, and when you use those parts to discriminate against an already misunderstood, marginalized community of people. That’s not the unconditional love of Christ at all.

If Jesus Christ were to step foot on American soil today, he would absolutely be hanging out among the LGBTQ+ community, and every other marginalized or minority group who has been unjustly persecuted in this world.

I’m simply standing firm as a child of God, a Christian, and the parent of a transgender child who was born that way. God bless.

Come at me, Another “Christian” Woman. You won’t do it. Bet.

Oh, and also? As per Another “Christian” Woman’s directive in her last paragraph, I did manage to save my breath. Because, you know. It doesn’t take a whole lot of air to compose a written response.

*Snark levels may be at slightly higher levels than usual due to being a liberal snowflake who is easily triggered by religious bigots who live in willful ignorance, especially when it’s 2018 — Google that sh*t! — and who’s also easily triggered by those who discriminate against my kid and every other person in the LGBTQ+ community. Love you! And God bless those who “Christians” would fail to recognize as “the least of these,” a.k.a., the most marginalized, the very people who are dire need of the unconditional love of the real Jesus Christ.

Written by

Seen in HuffPost, Scary Mommy, etc; heard @ NPR, SiriusXM, TIFO podcast & more. Gender dismantling trailblazer. Political news junkie. TikTok aficionado. Mom.

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